So a few months ago I wrote my first post in awhile. I then went dark again for a time. Last we spoke, I had been toying with the idea of leaving my job and starting something fresh. Well, my friends, I did actually act on that thought and took break from work (it’s been almost 8 weeks now). I am currently on sabbatical from my manager position and now finishing my MBA full time. The funniest part about this transition is that now Dating a Medical Student has turned to Business Student Married to Medicine….I digress
Transitioning back to school has been nothing short of great for me. I have offical coined the next 8 months – “The Year of Me.” This means that dealing with residency and Dr. B’s absence is much easier. He is now almost halfway through his first year of surgical residency and if anyone who reads remembers, that means that he is one year done through research fellowship and now halfway through 1st year residency…that means only……4.5 years to go of training and then 1 year of fellowship…oh my.
When I was working around the clock and Dr. B was in research fellowship, and then starting residency, I started to go to a dark place. I had thought that we were finally together and that being with someone in medicine would not be that hard after all that distance. Boy was I wrong. Once he started residency, he was not home much at all. The trouble with that was that nothing was getting done around our house, and I began to get overwhelmed because I also did not have time to commit to our home life. We were like two ships passing in the wind. I realized for my own personal sanity and for the balance we needed in our life, I needed to take a step back. That is a very difficult decision to make in my opinion. Not only had I been very independent and working full-time since the day I had graduated undergrad, but I also am a main monetary contributor.
Sometimes you have to do what needs to be done. I realized that I had been working so hard to support Dr. B and his dreams, but I had not taken time to realize my own. I knew I needed a change, and I took a leap of faith for something new. I am not sure what I am going to do in April when I graduate. Going back to the manager madness I came from does not sound appealing. However, I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders because I am finally doing something I have wanted to do for awhile. Dare I say I feel freed. It has been very good for my relationship with Dr. B as well because as much as I hate to admit it, I may have been holding a grudge on him because of my lack of ability to pursue something for me.
Divergence is scary, but omg is it freeing. Follow me on this new path – all, and I promise to keep you more informed as I actually have some precious time back!